Sunday, June 19, 2016

Being Lonely in a Relationship

Is it possible to feel lonely when you are in a relationship? Many people think that if they are in a relationship they'll feel loved, and sometimes people rush into a relationship just because they don't want to be lonely. 

I'm someone who never had a relationship before and this is my first relationship. Thankfully, before I enter this relationship with Ko Kevin I had a clear enough perspective about relationship... so I'm not very surprised at the fact that sometimes I still feel lonely even when I'm in a relationship.

The common mistakes to made is to ask more from our partner as the 'solution' to complete our need to be loved. I almost made that mistake too. These days I don't feel loved by him, even my mind clearly knows it. He cares for me, but still I don't feel loved anymore. (By the way at this moment when I'm typing, he's sending me a message and asking what do I do in a friendly tone. Oops, I'm caught! Haha)

Yes, that's a proof that sometimes it's not true that our partner doesn't care about us anymore. Just because we feel like that doesn't mean it's true. The reason why the lonely feeling comes even when you are loved enough is our hunger for deep intimacy can't be satisfied only with a relationship with a lover or even with family and friends. 

We are not made just to love each other. I realize once I understand the greatest love ever from my Creator, I'll longing for His love again and it can't be replaced with anyone's love. I won't expect my partner to love me exactly the same way my Creator love me even I know he tried. He tried his best and no wonder if he fails, he's still a human after all.

The thing is I need to back to my first love. Yes, He is my first love and He never forsaken me, His name is Jesus and I'm not ashamed of Him. People might think I'm crazy or what to call a religion as "love" but for me it's not me the one who's blinded. I'd rather to blinded by His love than blinded by the lies that His sacrifice is only a part of religion. Who will die in a cross for the sake of religion? What He did is in the name of love and that's why I choose to see His sacrifice as a love strike... and I need to love Him back.


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